Monday, May 11, 2009

Dick Goddard Is A Danger To Society

At least when he's behind the wheel.. We found out the hard way a week ago Saturday, when attempting to pull out of the Buehler's parking lot in Medina. Positioned second behind a large SUV waiting to pull onto Forest Meadows, the SUV hit the gas, thought better of it (for a reason incomprehensible to me), slammed on the brakes, and threw the behemoth into reverse, completely failing to notice our Toyota directly behind him. I threw the stick into reverse and slammed the gas, barely averting an accident. I laid on the horn and shook my fist at the still unknown perpetrator.

So, traffic clears again, and again, the SUV pulls forward into the street. In a bizarrely carbon copy moment, he AGAIN throws on the brakes and punches it into reverse. This time, clearly not expecting the same thing to happen, I'm not quick enough to react and WHAM. I hop out of the car, incredulous and angry. And who should lumber out from behind the steering wheel but Dick Goddard, the wooly bear weatherman himself.

Blindsided by this development, my anger is gone, replaced by a sort of surreal curiosity like, is this really happening? After the obligatory review of the damage and an apology from Dick for (obviously and incomprehendingly) not seeing our vehicle (TWICE); he heads back to his car for the apparently treacherous ride home.

But here's the kicker; in his legendary sing-song broadcast voice, he turns as he's walking away and says: "Well, (gesturing to himself) I'm Dick Goddard so you know where to find me."


The Grim Reaper, waiting for the casualties Dick Goddard inevitably inflicts on his drive home.

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